I Still Have Hope

Went to bed last night with the lowest pain level I've had in a long time. I was hopeful that meant today I would awake with this behind me or as least able to forego my daily downing of Tylenol. I was wrong.

My devotional's title today was "Be Prepared to Suffer for Me". Really Lord? I didn't want to, but I read it anyway. "Pain and problems are opportunities to demonstrate your trust in Me. Bearing your circumstances bravely - even thank Me for them - is one of the highest forms of praise." I don't know that I'm bearing it all bravely, but I do trust in Him. I'm just thankful I'm not in that dark place I was this time last year.

Here's what I don't understand, the why. Earlier this year, a wonderful, beautiful person I have been lucky to meet was diagnosed with cancer. It was found in her lungs and other vital organs and she was given a mere six-months to live. This was in early March. Her journey has been a painful and exhausting one. Yet, she has trusted in God throughout.

Her caringbridge journal has almost 100K hits since it was created just 7 months ago. She has touched the lives of so very many. If you knew her and her devotion to God, you would agree she is someone God should heal. But he hasn't yet. She has endured one setback after another, with grace and dignity because she trusts in the Lord. Her latest setback came last week and she was told by her doctors it would be a miracle if she makes it to Christmas.

Yesterday my sister-in-law went to visit Kim and while she was there they worked on "getting her things in order". It broke my heart to read the news. It hurts my hands to type this now. Yet, I still have hope. Kim may very well outlast me. I haven't given up on a miracle in Kim's life and in mine. As long as we draw breath, I still have hope.